Losing Friends

Around the time Callie was "diagnosed" Target got rid of it's gender specific toy section. This caused a lot of controversy, no matter what side you took someone was offended by your point of view. Don't get me wrong, I applaud Target for trying to make kids AND adults realize colors and toys don't make you a specific gender but at the same time it kind of does. Let me explain, my daughter who was born a boy knows she's a girl because of what she likes, thus meaning girl toys and boy toys are two different things. This doesn't mean a girl can't play with guns or cars, trust me I was the biggest tomboy out there when I was younger, but it also means that knowing your gender goes along with knowing what you like. I tried to explain this to a friend and he told me I shouldn't push gender roles on my kids-which I don't-and when I then told him I didn't force my daughter to be a girl he said that's not what he meant. But how can you have one without the other? How can she be taught gender specific roles and not be forced to be a specific gender? When she was portrayed as a boy she was surrounded by both boy and girl things, she had her choice of toy, she even had her choice of clothes when all of them fit in the same size. I never once sat down and told her "Listen kid you have to be a girl, I really want another daughter" to be honest I loved the dynamic of twin boys and a little girl that our family had, but that wasn't how our family was meant to be. I feel like when you tell someone your child is transgender they automatically think that you had something to do with it, but so many studies show just the opposite. It doesn't matter what kind of family you're in, how many boys or girls are in the family, how much money you have, if you're supposed to be a different gender you will know. This friend sadly wasn't the only one who thought this way I have actually lost so many friends and received hateful text messages, emails, Facebook messages, and so much more from people who I thought were my friends. The ones who truly matter in my life stuck by me, but it still stinks that some people couldn't take the time to get to know my girl before judging her. Martin Luther King JR is quoted with saying "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by color of their skin, but by the content of their character" let's make his dream come true and judge only based on the content of ones character.